Should I be concerned if my man goes out with his friends but never takes me along?

Drinks-MarcelloMI was asked this question repeatedly last week, apparently it’s quite a common thing. When I asked the guys, I got so many different answers. If the video wasn’t littered with so much bad language I’d post it because it would prove very educational. Some guys had reasons that were (kind of) understandable and some were very awkward and proved why so many women are distrusting of men.

First reason that I got told is, it’s a night out with just the boys. This guy wanted an opportunity to be a man with his friends. He wanted to chill out, have a laugh and talk about sports and general man stuff and take a break from his family for a few hours. He and his wife have alternate weeks when one gets to go out and the other stays at home with the kids. Personally I see no harm in that, it’s the only time that they get to socialise with their friends and there are no dubious actions taking place.

Another guy said that he didn’t bring his other half out because it was his time to, “eat away from home”. No, he was not referring to going out for a meal with his friends. There were looks of agreement and understanding and I must admit, I was a little shocked. What this guy was saying is that he likes to hook up with other women on his nights out, naturally I probed him and his response was that he needed to feel like he still had it, he went on to justify his actions with, “I don’t ever see them again and I told tell them I love them”. Hmmmmm

The most commonly repeated reason was that it was too much trouble if the other half had too much to drink. At first it would be funny but if it became a repeated occurrence it was embarrassing for the friends to see the other half in this state.

One of the guys round the table said that he would love to take his other half out with him but it’s too much hassle. By that he meant that, if they went home afterwards, his girlfriend would start asking about something one of the guys said or did and turn it into an argument, such as, “Bob went up to that girl in the bar, I bet you thought she was prettier than me”. This made him feel uncomfortable and put him on edge whenever they went out and so he stopped going out with her.

The most commonly repeated reason was that it was too much trouble if the other half had too much to drink. At first it would be funny but if it became a repeated occurrence it was embarrassing for the friends to see the other half in this state. The guys all agreed that they didn’t like having to go out with someone who they had to look after and continuously keep an eye on. They all like to go out and let their hair down without any responsibility for anyone but themselves.

I think it’s healthy for partners to go out with each others friends but not all the time. You want your partner to know your friends and you want to know theirs also. However it’s important to have some independence and space otherwise you’re in each others pockets.

To keep up with me, feel free to find me either on, www.facebook.com/thebreakuprecipe or on twitter @munirbello1983

About the author

Munir Bello is our resident male dating blogger: ‘Men Uncovered Blog’. Each week he will answer the most common questions posed by women about men. Munir Bello is the Author of The Break Up Recipe, A 5 star rated romantic comedy about break ups and relationships from a mans point of view, available on Amazon as a download or paperback. . Follow Munir on Twitter @munirbello1983 or www.facebook.com/thebreakuprecipe

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