Friends with Benefits

Well, thank the good Lord above for the Olympics!! London is raining with men! Hallelujah!!Where did all these guys come from?  I love the spirit of the City.. as the anthem is not going to sing itself off the sheets a lot of us stayed behind to cheer our teams on, ehmm by partying…. That’s the spirit!!!  It comes as no surprise then that my diary has been chock blocked with parties and more parties and then some!! Good thing is that in the spirit of the Olympics, I get more opportunities to research!! No complaints there!!

So being in high spirits, Paul and I trotted downtown on Saturday night for  a good catch up!!! The situation with Paul is interesting: we swing between friendship, romance and the dating mode!! Which is it going to be? I honestly don’t know!! But you know sometimes, the path to finding true love, through what has come to be popularly known as dating,  can put pressure on one’s happiness.  The dating process alone, have its ups and downs, expectations are sometimes not met, and sometimes, situations just goes way beyond what one expects it to be, at the positive end!! But what I have come to notice as I go along this holy path in my search of the truth, is that the constant focus of the ultimate goal does influence my actions when I go on dates!! Gosh the pressure is too hard to bear!!! Do you feel me?!! I mean, I, knowing me very well, and you knowing me by now, will vouch that I will not do anything out of the ordinary under the Wise Girl oath so we’re good on that front. But I must say that the thought of seeing the potential sitting right infront of me can make me do some really crazy stuff on a date!! Especially when I feel I have learnt something from  past mistakes do feel very keen to correct those mistakes on new dates!!! I end up ‘freezing’ up on key stuff, etiquettes or thoughts on the good dates!!  I become too conscious  of the possibility of  the future in the present that I loose the present!! Drama and Dilemma!!

So then, this romance on,  romance off situation with Paul may be a good thing! Maybe being friends with benefit (s) (the good kinda way, the Wise Girl way) may be the best thing because it take the dating pressure and edge off a bit! Which means when the romance is on, I end up enjoying myself a lot more…..Just a thought!!  Thus, this was going to be one of those nights for Paul and I where the atmosphere felt like being on a date but the underlying tone was far away from that!!!  Given the high party spirits of the City in the season of  the Olympics and the fact that the sun gods blessed up with great sun and some great eye candy for me of course, I felt this was  a great opportunity for research! Why restrain the adventure to one dimension?!! So I wasn’t that disappointed that this night out didn’t feel like being on a date with Paul, instead it felt like I could safely ‘research’ and still have a good night out with a potential Mr Right!

Standing at the bar, I noticed one more interesting fact about men – their hunting style.. It was interesting to see this play out right in front of me,and you know I enjoy observing these facts right?!! Here’s the nugget… if guys check out the dynamics between two people standing around (in this case a guy and a girl) and sense that the two are not dating or engaged in any sort of a romantic relationship, they will jump straight onto the game!! As Paul and I were waiting for our drinks to be poured out at the bar, he was ordering whiles I was just hanging on and checking the scene out, … it wasn’t like I was standing miles away from him, no, I was standing right by his side; next thing I know, this guy rocks up next to me and started chatting away to me! The underlying chat up lines were too obvious to miss but I also felt it would be rude to blank him out Candy was eye popping likeable!!! So I engaged him and then before I could say dash, another one rocked up!! I could just as well capture the competition levels in the air, physically, if I wanted to!!!

Engaging with the other guys didn’t mean I was being disrespectful to Paul as there are still no strong ties just yet, but then Paul is also a friend and a possible (hmm?) Mr Right,  so although the experience was exciting the WiseGirl code is not to make him feel superbly uncomfortable – so I pulled away gradually from the circle. I always think what goes around has a funny way of coming around so yeah… I’m being thoughtful too

This romance on, romance off situation with Paul is fun….Maybe I’ll put him on the ‘friends with benefits’ list! But then and again, I also do not want to make that list too long… Oh drama, drama, drama!!

-WiseGirl

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