Handle your business

For after all it is your business! One of my greatest peeves with our kind (women) is that for some odd reason we do have a core need to self disclose to all and sundry? Don’t ask me why, for I am also at fault.  It is even worse when we meet a new guy!!  Why  we choose to focus on the negative or most unattractive thing (s) about us when self disclosing, I also do not know!!

Why oh why!?!!

Frank Bernard Dicksee. Chivalry

Photo credit: Wikipedia

It is a mystery because why else will I start my date with this new guy by explaining how bad I am in organising my diary when I know damn well that I am one of the most organised people in the world.  What is this pathological enthusiasm that I have towards disclosing the negative or appearing to have a negative (which I do of course)? Pfff!!! And sadly I am not alone on this one.. (thank goodness for that!) for I know of one other very successful lady who voluntarily offered information about her rather disturbing make up routine when she wasn’t even asked!

Maybe we get a kick out of playing the damsel in distress?!!

Thing is, guys (in their infinite wisdom) don’t really care to know what we are bad at, or how dysfunctional some of us are (moi) in keeping diaries together! All he cares about, especially at the dating stage,  is that we can handle our business and display some confidence in doing so! It doesn’t mean they don’t know we have faults, gosh, we all have them!!! It simply means that we can hold our corner without him.

Just like wearing Heels, Confidence is superbly sexy! 

I noticed how important this display of confidence is to Mr New Guy (we’ll call him just that for now).  he didn’t say any thing negative about himself during the whole  dinner date, although you and I know he’s bound to have one or two, nor did he acknowledge my rather rushed negative information!  So if he doesn’t care to know the bad whatnots, then frankly,  I shouldn’t be forthcoming with them either.

That said, maybe at some point, at some stage and one day, playing a damsel in distress wouldn’t hurt! Especially if and when I need to show him that I need him around. But for now, I will have to keep certain things to myself and so should you!

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  • Patrick Latter

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AWiseGirl.com was created to test out a new phenomenon!! We hear of countless stories where women (and many women around the world) go on a date, maybe once or twice…. get to know the guy and then as soon as she makes up her mind that this is the guy that she would like to have in her life… the guy suddenly turns cold towards her!!! Sounds familiar? What happened? How did this nice guy who was pursuing you countlessly suddenly turned cold the moment you started to show an interest in him? Why did he change his attitude? Why did he stopped calling, stopped texting, cancelled the date (with an excuse— I’m sick! and never called back)

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