Are you caring for others on a regular basis?
Do you forget to care for yourself?
Then almost assuredly you are on a downward path to a burnout emotionally, psychologically and physically. More and more women in particular, but men as well are finding themselves in the position of having children at home, elderly parents to care for (which only increases with time) and a full-time job or business of your own. Taking care of yourself, seems naturally to sink to the bottom of the demands on you and your time – This needs to change.
There has never been a more opulent time in history, people are living better and longer, couples are choosing to have children later in life, when they have a foothold on the corporate ladder or the entrepreneurial escalator, this of course has a knock-on effect as to when they come into the various journey points as well. Children starting school, graduating, leaving home, parents ageing and their dependence increasing, the see-saw of juggling your time, needs and self-respect becomes a hugely different ball game.
These are some of the base reasons why: “Prescriptions for 64.7m items of antidepressants – an all-time high – were dispensed in England in 2016, the most recent annual data from NHS Digital showed. That was 3.7m more than the 61m items dispensed during 2015. It also represents a massive 108.5 per cent increase on the 31m antidepressants which pharmacies dispensed in 2006.”
The need for self-care has never been more needed, mental health first aid should be a priority, not just for companies who do have a duty of care, but each individual has a duty of care for themselves as well. Learning to say no, aligning boundaries to your needs is not egoistic or selfish, it is essential. If you are an adult and do not choose to care for yourself, why should anyone else? What lessons are you teaching to your children, or your teams at work? Being an adult means making choices, there are only 2 sides of the fence, being part of the solution, or part of the problem.
Many a time people are suffering often in silence, because they feel “they should be coping,” or they are living in denial, which is a great place to live, but it is not reality, your mind and body will take over. Self-care is not a luxury, it is a necessity, keeping your promises to yourself are as important as keeping them to others.
Life and time seems to pass so quickly now, but we only get one life, no luxuries of a dress rehearsal or time warps, all gadgets and gizmos have off switches, we just need to choose to use them, our time is our most precious resource, it is not infinite, nor is it recoverable – once it has been spent, it is gone!
Stress, anxiety and depression are the biggest combined cause of absenteeism in the workplace, they are costing all of us huge sums of money, the NHS and medical services are being stretched by many conditions that can be solved by you, in your life; just by making other choices. Strokes, heart attacks and depression can all be reduced by taking the control of your life back. In all honesty life is not always fair, it gives us curve balls and traumas, but that is reality for everyone at one time or another, how we deal with them is the big difference. Emotional resilient people will choose to find a positive way through, it is these times that make us stronger.
The demands on our time are enormous and the speed we are now accustomed to, fast cars, quickie divorces and instant connections, makes us feel less competent and confident if we cannot do, all that is asked of us, in seconds. This is illogical and unattainable as a continual lifestyle. Avoiding burnout is becoming more and more essential, taking steps to ensure your own well-being is a prime target. Living longer is a privilege, that not everyone is granted, but being older and mentally resilient as well as physically mobile makes life amazingly good.
Prevention is always better than cure, start today and see that even small changes can make a big difference, to you and to those around you. Caring for yourself as much as you care for others is commendable, caring for others to the detriment of your own well-being is devastating for you and for others, because when you run out of fuel and resilience the need for care will be doubled – for you and for them.
Be kind to yourself and show others you value yourself, that way they will too and change is amazingly fast. You deserve to enjoy your life, the way you want to live it, with those who mean the most to you.
Why choose anything else?
About the author
Linda Sage is an international resilience and self-care expert, speaker, writer, trainer and mentor, with over 30 years’ experience of helping individuals care for themselves as much as they care for others. Raising awareness, understanding and prevention of emotional, psychological and physical burnout. Learning to say no, and resetting their mind-set to value themselves as much as others.