My boss once asked me about what goes through a mans mind when the first date is going to the cinema.
You turn up to the date and give the lady a choice of movies. She wants to see a romcom. The cinema is also showing an action movie that’s been on the lips of every man. You end up opting to watch the romcom that your date wants to see. Have you chosen to watch it simply because it’s what she wants or do you have any interest in actually watching the movie? What would you do if the same scenario was repeated with your wife?
For some I can imagine it being tricky to decide what to do in this situation. On a first date you want to put your best foot forward and give a good first impression. Sometimes you will want to compromise in order to not appear too difficult, therefore if the person chose a cartoon about princesses, you might end up going along with the idea this one time but you wouldn’t make a habit of it unless you like that sort of thing.
She was completely unaware of his loathing of them. It started with her suggesting that they watch one and he went along with it. She loved the fact the he “liked” them that he kept up the pretence just to make her happy.
I went for dinner with my men and put this question to them and the most opinionated of the group said that there is no way that he would go and watch a romcom with his first date, unless she agreed to watch an action movie or go paintballing with him straight afterwards. This guy is what you would call a mans man (can skin a rabbit and hit a deer between the eyes with a bullet from 500 yards) and nothing would make him change his opinion on the matter.
The other guys said that they didn’t mind what they watched as long as they got to go for a drink afterwards and have a chat. The younger guys in the group said that that they’d go along with whatever she said on the first date to be a gentleman but the next time they would present her with an alternative. The group as a whole said that they didn’t mind romcoms too much as it provided them with an opportunity to set the mood for potential romance at the end of the night.
Another guy who was in a long term relationship stated that his girlfriend loved romcoms and he loathed them. She was completely unaware of his loathing of them. It started with her suggesting that they watch one and he went along with it. She loved the fact the he “liked” them that he kept up the pretence just to make her happy. He also didn’t want to come cross as a liar and after over 4 years he felt that it was too late to tell her the truth. He said it also scored him plenty of brownie points which he was determined to keep.
It’s very rare that I would choose to go to the cinema for a first date as I’d be wanting to get to know the person that I was meeting for the first time. I’d be more likely to want to go for dinner or something that allows us to engage in a conversation. However should the cinema ever be on the cards then speaking personally, I’d watch whatever was suggested by the date if I had an interest in watching the film but if I really didn’t want to see it I’d say so and suggest something else as an alternative. The same scenario would apply whether it was a first date or if it was a trip to the cinema with my wife.