This has to be one of the most confusing times for most people.
I was talking to a friend last night who had been through this experience. She was seeing a guy and things were going well. She thought the encounter was about to take the natural progression into an established relationship. Out of the blue the guy sent her a text message stating that he had no interest in taking things further. He didn’t offer much of an explanation and it was all very blunt. Needless to say that she was extremely confused and didn’t take it well. She started trying to analyse the different scenarios during their time together to see where it could have possibly gone wrong.
Regardless of how confused or attached you are to that person, a clean break will help to soften the blow. If you move on gracefully without repeatedly contacting them or stalking their social media you’ll feel better for it afterwards.
This is one of the hardest things for most people. A sudden withdrawal of affection puts you in emotional quicksand because you’re trying to understand what’s happening. It has you feeling like you’re scrambling at the bottom of a barrel full of water and there’s nobody in sight to help you get out of it. The unfortunate thing is, in most cases, only the person who has decided to sever ties knows the reasons that they have chosen to end things. If the person chooses not to disclose anything to you and keeps putting distance between you then you simply have to accept it and move on.
The person will have their reasons, some will say that they realised that you two were too different or you weren’t compatible in the first place. Whatever it is, the basic truth is that the other person no longer wants to be with you, so you should move on and let time heal your pain. Regardless of how confused or attached you are to that person, a clean break will help to soften the blow. If you move on gracefully without repeatedly contacting them or stalking their social media you’ll feel better for it afterwards. Sometimes it’s better that you don’t know because they might say that it’s a defect in your personality, which makes you question yourself. Sometimes it might be that, they have moved on to someone else (trust me, you really would rather not know)
A sudden withdrawal of affection puts you in emotional quicksand because you’re trying to understand what’s happening.
It’s always hard to cut ties or break up with someone. In my opinion if you’re going to end things with someone you should be able to tell the person why. It’s cowardly to just vanish and it really affects the other person more than you know. If the guy doesn’t have the courage to have a mature conversation with you, then they were no good for you in the first place.
Coming next week: “What are the signs of a good man? How do I know if he really likes me?”