There are many different types of loss we incur throughout our lives and, if left unresolved, can unconsciously hold us back from the success we desire.
Often when we think of grief, we immediately jump to the death of a loved one. Yet there are many other types of loss — such as miscarriage, infertility, illness, job loss or divorce — that are just as devastating and worth giving the proper time and space to process. The truth is that if we don’t allow ourselves to deal with our grief it can prevent us from achieving our full potential.
There are some common ways unresolved grief can show up at work that most people wouldn’t label as such. But if you’re experiencing a loss of focus, productivity and confidence, there is likely a build-up of unprocessed emotion at the root.
Here are some common ways unresolved grief can show up at work:
- Distraction and mistakes
Grief causes so many internal changes and takes a lot of emotional energy to cope with. You might find it harder to think clearly or be as present as you want to be at work, leading to mistakes and a loss of confidence.
- Isolation and playing small
Grief can cause us to feel out of control with our emotions and less able to show up fully for meetings, presentations, or simply to share our ideas.
- Emotional outbursts, overreactions or hypersensitivity to criticism
The internal pressure of unresolved grief means we’re more likely to take umbrage with small things like a passing comment or throwaway joke, which makes the working environment more challenging to be a part of.
- More sick days
Unresolved grief can show itself as a sense of dread when you wake up, and lead to more sick days.
- Fear of public speaking
Often people mislabel the fear of speaking in front of an audience as simply nerves, instead of the result of unresolved emotion that’s been pushed down in an attempt to push through.
- Decreased productivity
Grief affects physical energy levels, and you may feel more tired and not as productive. You may stop healthy habits, leading to lower energy levels and an ever-growing to-do list as you procrastinate on tasks that used to feel easier.
- Staying in your comfort zone
Unresolved emotions and grief makes it more likely you’ll stay in your comfort zone, not putting yourself forward for promotions or big projects. This might be showing up as a reluctance to return to the office after lockdown, instead of leading the way.
Unfortunately, most of us haven’t been taught how to let go of the grief, trauma, pain and hurt that is unconsciously holding us back. But when we have a proper understanding of how and why unresolved grief shows up, and work with a qualified practitioner to release it, success becomes inevitable.
About the author
Dipti Solanki is an award winning Life Coach, Grief Coach and Natural health practitioner. She specialises in helping people with grief, anxiety & depression and has over thirteen years of experience working with individuals and groups. She is also a lecturer and speaker on mental health. Dipti’s journey with this work started in her early teens after the sudden death of her mother due to medical negligence and other losses led to her suffering from debilitating anxiety and depression for years. It was after doing the deep work herself and breaking free from this she recognised the true lack of helpful information about grief in all its forms and how to deal with it all in a practical way. Her work really centres around how truly vital it is to attend to your grief to remain truly emotionally & physically healthy using her unique methods.
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