As time goes on, we notice the negative and toxic aspects that are always present, even in the most exemplary business. The behaviours of some colleagues or leaders contribute to the negativity and toxicity.
Individuals carry out these behaviours to gain more power, control, and privilege. An individual can do this, or a group comes together to create a zeitgeist.
Once this happens, the sense of what is acceptable changes, from respect and compassion to destructive and awful. This then produces a pervasive atmosphere in which most must work and comply or become involved in also being destructive.
What people use and tolerate can vary from minor actions such as gossip, over-competitiveness to more serious deeds including fraud, bullying, and harassment. The impact of these will depend on their frequency, intensity and seriousness and the effect on those who are the target or just in the organisation. The overall aim is to stifle, suppress, and demotivate, so people forget their own worth. A false claim that someone is misusing their computer may be minor but could have a very significant impact on the person, especially if they consider they are honest.
Awful cultures can continue, once established, through the actions of current leaders and employees, even if created by those who have left. They endure because the instigators may like this type of culture, or not know what else to do, or there is not sufficient oversight or interest to warrant bringing in a more positive approach. Overall, we need three conditions for adverse cultures to continue; individuals who feel justified in using negative behaviours, permission for their continued use, and a failure of leadership and internal justice systems to identify and address the negativity.
There is an easy to identify list from minor behaviours such as negative competitiveness and gossip, hypocrisy and lying to larger acts such as abuse of power, fraud and corruption, discrimination (often indirect), bullying and harassment. It is rare for these behaviours to be used singly and often people will use a range of these actions. Why do people use them?
These behaviours will have developed over time and the person is likely to have learned them either directly or vicariously in environments that facilitate their use. This can be in childhood and then corroborated in adulthood. Individuals who use these behaviours, with a few exceptions, are not secure in themselves and therefore want to dominate the situation. Or they want revenge or see others as a threat with little evidence to support their views.
They may not have learned a wider repertoire for positive leading or interacting with people. Such personalities will disengage, morally, from the impact of their acts. They will probably carry on with their actions and habits because they won’t have had feedback.
People who bully, for example, are likely to select individuals who aren’t assertive, acquiesce, and feel insecure or threatened. The impact of such actions is always negative for those who are the targets. The psychological effect of these behaviours is huge and distressing for recipients and the overall culture of the organisation, even if they are infrequent. For example, occasionally using silencing, ridicule, withholding information, and shaming.
As noted above, if there has been permission (direct or tacit), then we will see these behaviours. What also happens is that others feel they can behave unethically.
For us to decrease the use of these adverse behaviours, we need to help people who are the targets, identify how to help the individuals using these acts and work to improve the environment. Humans can change once we understand the need because we are flexible in terms of our neurology.
Having been a target, choosing to act will depend on how strong you feel and your assigned power in the organisation. Remember that being the focus for these acts is not your fault. If this is not the right time, think about what you can do to keep yourself safe. Perhaps talk to your manager or seek professional help from a coach or counsellor.
If you decide to act, then the first step is to speak to the person using the behaviours, ask them to explain and change. It is important to first practise what to say while relaxed. Focus on specific events and not generalities. If the meeting goes well, then work out a plan for change. If you cannot speak or the meeting fails, then talk to a senior leader or Ombudsperson for advice on next steps.
If you are the manager helping the person who is carrying out these actions, remember that they are likely to feel threatened and insecure. Having verified that their behaviours were problematic, meet with them and provide an agenda in advance to help them relax. Start the discussion by outlining their positives. Choose one or two instances and ask for their perspectives on each situation, their rationale for using those behaviours and what were the consequences and impact.
Agree a plan for change with them and identify what you will do to help them throughout the process. Plans should include mechanisms for building self-control and self-reflection through feedback and adopting and practicing alternative behaviours for interacting. This will work for some and, for others, all you can expect is more appropriate behaviour but limited internal change.
At the systems level, first acknowledge that the negative exists and needs to be tackled. Subsequently, work on building collective responsibility to promote positive behaviours and address negatives without recrimination. Leadership should also show the expected behaviours and encourage others to do the same. We also need a practical internal justice system and associated policies.
Anna Eliatamby is a clinical psychologist, workplace well-being expert and author of Healthy Leadership and Organisations: Beyond The Shadow Side, out now priced £14.99.
April
29apr11:4514:00Women in Business Networking - London networking - London City
29/04/2025 11:45 - 14:00(GMT+01:00)
The Anthologist
58 Gresham Street, London, EC2V 7BB
Kick off your 2025 in style by networking with us. A fabulous mix of formal & informal networking over a facilitated business lunch
WIBN networking is here to create a platform for like-minded women, who passionately drive their business forward and collaborate with others to help them achieve success.
WIBN is a business network organisation for women business owners and employed professionals, who network each month over a facilitated business lunch. Our members support and encourage each other through collaboration and the sharing of business contacts and opportunities. The meetings are structured and effective, whilst also being supportive and friendly!
As Women Business Owners we know that one person can transform your business but think what you could achieve with a tribe of supportive and passionate business owners?? At WIBN we recognise that often women lack relevant networking opportunities simply because they network in a different way to men!
Our monthly meetings are a fabulous mix of formal and informal networking which includes your own 60 secs pitch, a focused spotlight session from a member and lunch.Our philosophy in this group is simple – No sister left behind! Come along to our WIBN group as a visitor and experience the potential to grow your business in a more productive way.
WIBN has a professional exclusivity policy so it’s one profession per group – see below * . As long as your profession is not already represented you would be welcome to visit a group twice before deciding if you want to join.
WIBN is a monthly membership group and a 12 month commitment will be required after you have visited a maximum of two times. Full details and prices will be given at the meeting.
*in the event that your profession is already represented at your chosen meeting then the organiser saves the right to propose another place or date. If we cannot relocate you then a full refund will be given.
30apr10:0016:00Women's Health Champion Course (CPD Accredited)
30/04/2025 10:00 - 16:00(GMT+01:00)
Periods, menopause,
They’re everyday realities for millions of women and they directly impact performance, engagement and retention.
But stigma, silence and a lack of knowledge mean many managers and HR professionals don’t know how to spot the signs or have the right conversations.
It’s time to change that.
Our Women’s Health Champion Training is designed to break the silence and build real, practical support in your organisation – every single day.
Delivered by two expert trainers, this engaging course covers:
✅ Menstrual health and managing period-related challenges
✅ Fertility, pregnancy, and baby loss (including returning to work)
✅ Gynaecological conditions like endometriosis, fibroids and PCOS
✅ Menopause and long-term wellbeing
✅ Practical strategies to create a truly inclusive culture
Date: Wednesday 30th April 2025
Time: 10.00am – 4.00pm
Place: Zoom
Cost: £495 per person
Or get in touch if you’d like us to create a bespoke course for your organisation.