Ever had a moment where you really wanted to say something, yet you chickened out? Maybe your stomach did a little flip, your palms got clammy, and you decided, “Nope, not today.”
Welcome to the club!
Neuroscientists call this “social threat” – our brain’s way of protecting us from social rejection. Speaking up can feel like stepping onto thin ice. What if you offend someone? What if you make things worse?
Here’s the thing: staying silent can be just as costly. And when done right, speaking up can actually deepen trust, shift perspectives, and even inspire change.
So, how do we do this without turning every convo into a battlefield? We Partner Up! Here’s your game plan:
Step 1: Prep Like a Pro – Think about what you want to say in advance. (Bonus points for making it both kindand clear – shoutout to Brené Brown!)
Step 2: Get the Green Light – Asking permission (“Can I share a thought?”) makes people way more open to hearing you out.
Step 3: Listen & Reflect – Try this magic phrase: “If I understand correctly, you’re saying…” It shows respect and clarifies you understand the person’s point of view (not that you necessarily agree). Bonus: Watch this video on Active Listening
Step 4: Speak Your Truth – Keep it short, direct, and (if needed) make a request.
Step 5: Learn & Level Up – After the interaction, ask yourself: What worked? What flopped? What would you tweak next time?
Want to see a real-life example? Watch this video: Be Brave, Speak Up! where I put my Partner skills to the test, live, and with real stakes.
Need extra fuel for your fire: Be Brave: 3 Strategies To Speak Up For Yourself And Others (Forbes.com)
Now, I want to hear from you! Have you had a “speak up” moment lately – good, bad, or messy? Drop me a line at mailto:[email protected]Let’s learn from each other!
If you’re ready to upgrade your life, enhance your communication & leadership skills and become the best version of you, check out Amy Carroll Coaching on YouTube
About the author
Amy Carroll is a business coach and motivational speaker, specialising in leadership and positive influence.
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IG: Amy Carroll Coach | Linkedin: Amy Carroll Coaching | www.carrollcoaching.com
