Some absolutely adore it; some loath it. My partner and I have never really been ones to celebrate the day with romantic gestures, but, since having kids the rare opportunity to take some time to celebrate us as a couple feels more appealing!
I do believe, however, that there is something 10 times more romantic than flowers on Valentine’s Day. That is to be fully supported by your partner on your dreams for career progression.
Bear with me.
Research suggests that when people have children, often women’s career progression tends to stall whilst male trajectories progress.
Now, of course, you don’t need a partner to progress your career, in fact, there are many, including Avivah Wittenberg-Cox, who believe that an unsupportive partner can hinder your career progression and it’s better not to have any partner than having an unsupportive one.
But, if you’re taking some time to celebrate your partnership this year, this could be the perfect opportunity to talk about the very practical things your other half could do to support your career progression.
Here are some ideas for things you could discuss at your Valentine’s Day dinner.
When was the last time anyone asked you about your career dreams? In fact, when was the last time you really thought about these ambitions yourself? A quiet moment together could be the perfect opportunity to talk about your ambitions for the future and how you might get there together. Why not take it in turns to ask each other ‘what are your career dreams?’ and just listen for 10 minutes. You may be surprised where the conversation leads. Our 10 questions for couples to ask prompts might be a helpful conversation starter.
We hear from our Leaders Plus Fellows that one of the biggest barriers to career progression is finding the time to think carefully about what they want and how to get there. So, why not think about the practical things you can do as a couple to create the mental space you need to concentrate on your career? For example, you can agree a regular catch up on the last Friday of every month to discuss career development. Or, if there is simply too much on your plate such as household admin or childcare, discuss how to divide up the mental load more evenly. Remember, it is not just about dividing tasks equally but dividing the mental load!
Career development can often come with big decisions that affect your home life. So, if you’re aiming for a senior career, it can help to have discussed your position on these in advance. For example, would you be willing to relocate for a role? If yes, does that include internationally? And what childcare arrangements would you consider in order to accommodate a more demanding role. Ironing out some of these beforehand can help make the process less stressful.
Have the honest long-term chat about attitudes to flexible working. If you have children who, if anyone, is willing to work part-time. Sadly, a huge factor in the gender pay gap is the burden on mothers to move to part-time working, around 25% of the gender pay gap is driven by the fact that part time work is paid less per hour than fulltime work per hour, so having an honest discussion upfront about your preferences on flexible working and considering a shared responsibility for part-time working will help to counter this. Of course, we need to change that part time penalty and organisations such as Leaders Plus are trying to change that.
Successful career progression for couples comes in many shapes and sizes and there really is no ‘one-size-fits-all’ solution. But thinking in advance about what might work could be helpful. Will it be a dual career model where both couples are in careers that are equally valued? Or will there be a primary/secondary career model? Will it change over time? Have an honest chat about that. Professor Jennifer Petriglieri finds that dual career models are as happy as the other ones, something she discusses in depth on our Big Careers, Small Children podcast.
The best way that your partner can have an impact on your career is by being conscientious. Brittany C Solomon and Joshua J Jackson found that your partner’s conscientiousness has an impact on your income, on job satisfaction and on promotion, her research found that people who have very conscientious spouses are 50% more likely to be promoted. I.e. if your partner does what they say they will do, it makes you more likely to succeed in your career.
So, how about, when you have that romantic dinner this Valentine’s Day, what better way to show love than to share your career dreams with each other and discuss how you can support each other to achieve them. Happy Valentines!
Verena Hefti, FRSA is the CEO and Founder of the award-winning social enterprise Leaders Plus and the host of the 5-star rated Big Careers, Small Children Podcast.
Too often parents feel they have to choose between being a good parent and a fulfilling leadership career. Leaders Plus exist to change this and
supports leaders with young children to progress their own careers alongside raising their families, as well as empowering parents to drive change within their organisations through a ground-breaking Fellowship Programme.
As part of the 9-month Fellowship, parents receive a senior leader mentor, expert career development support, group coaching, a supportive cross sector network of peers and practical support to overcome work/life hurdles. The Fellowship is accessible online and face-to-face and is open to all genders, the closing date for applications is 01 March 2022.
May
19may18:0020:30The Future of Fairness in Leadership and Business | WBS
19/05/2025 18:00 - 20:30(GMT+01:00)
WBS at the Shard
London, SE1 9SG
This is your chance to engage in powerful dialogue and spark meaningful change in your professional sphere. After the panel discussion, network with peers from across industries
After the panel discussion, network with peers from across industries over drinks and canapés, against the vibrant backdrop of London.
This event is held annually in collaboration with our partners We are the City, Women Engineering Society, Forte, City Women Network and 30% Chair; We are delighted to welcome a distinguished line-up of keynote speakers:
Dr Dawn Eubanks – Associate Professor of Behavioural Science & EI and Panel Chair
Rukasana Bhaijee – Global Head of DEI at the Financial Times. A DEI leader with over 13 years of experience across media, technology, professional services, and higher education. Formerly led DEI for Google’s EMEA tech division and consulted at EY, Rukasana brings deep expertise in strategy, race equity, and inclusive culture change.
Geraldine Gallacher – CEO of the Executive Coaching Consultancy, author of Coaching Women: Changing the System, Not the Person, and City Women Network Board member.
Mark Swain – WBS Client Director & Executive Coach, and Fellow of The Learning and Performance Institute. With over 20 years experience in leadership development Mark has developed a framework supporting Women in Strategy.
Ben Evans – New Business Director, AtkinsRéalis, ED&I Advocate and Warwick MBA Alumnus (2013)
Together, they’ll share their invaluable insights, strategies, and real-world experiences in fostering fairness and driving success in today’s dynamic and changing corporate landscape.
Key Topics Include:
Whether you’re a mid-career professional, an established leader, or an entrepreneur passionate about shaping the future of fairness, this event will leave you inspired and equipped to make a lasting impact.
Free
21may12:0013:00Master the Art of Incredible Interviews | WeAreTheCity & City CV
21/05/2025 12:00 - 13:00(GMT+01:00)
WeAreTheCity & City CV are thrilled to present a
Do interviews leave you feeling uneasy, underprepared or unsure of how to showcase your best self? Are you stuck in a loop of missed opportunities, wondering how to stand out and seal the deal? You’re not the only one. On average, people apply for 27 roles before they land just one interview.
But don’t worry – you’re in the right place. Whether it’s been years since your last interview, you’re chasing a promotion or new role, or simply trying to stay sharp, this free one-hour masterclass will give you the edge to win your next role. Your interview isn’t just a conversation – it’s a marketing pitch where you’re the product. Discover how to demonstrate your value, convince employers you’re the best investment they can make, and leave them thinking, “We’d be foolish not to hire you.”
In this jam-packed session, Victoria McLean, Founder & CEO of City CV, guides you through the art of wowing interviewers. With a proven track record of helping people at all career levels secure their dream roles, Victoria brings decades of expertise, countless success stories and award-winning career strategies to the table.
What you’ll learn:
Looking for more career support? Explore our Career Resources page. Ready to take the next step? Browse the latest opportunities on our Job Board and find your perfect role today!
23may10:0012:00Online* Pelvic Floor Recovery Workshop FREE | Karen Ellis - Postnatal Recovery Expert
23/05/2025 10:00 - 12:00(GMT+01:00)
With former Midwife, Karen Ellis. *Available on replay. Exactly how to rebuild strength in your pelvic floor after pregnancy. All the information you should have got from
All the information you should have got from your midwife about how to recover your pelvic floor PROPERLY after having a baby and how to exercise SAFELY so you can smile with excitement and enjoy the moment when your toddler takes your hand and pulls you towards the bouncy castle instead of the feeling of dread taking over as you decline their invitation.
You are a mum who;
And so you can have dry knickers!
Free